Sunday, November 21, 2010

The debate continues_


In rebuttal to Brittany's comment on my Let the debate begin post..

Brittany Ryan said...

While an apple can be enjoyed both lukewarm and chilled, with cheese and with peanut butter and on the go or in your home, it doesn't come without faults.

When tossed into a backpack or a purse, the apple can easily become bruised and dented making that patch less desirable.

While the waste is in fact organic, you still have to be conscious of eating around the core or you bite into that unpleasant seed-filled bark like center thus detracting from the overall experience of enjoying your snack.

Now, clementines on the other hand high in Vitamin C, delicious chilled or lukewarm, have no wrappers and have organic waste. The easily fit in your pocket and are not susceptible to bruising or denting. They are the most easily peeled of the citrus fruits and rarely have seeds to be concerned with. To top it off, they leave your hands smelling fresh and citrusy for hours after you've finished your snack. 



It obviously cannot be disputed that clementines, whilst incomparable to apples when it comes to the ideal snack, truly are an excellent source of Vitamin C. Indeed they can also be tossed into a backpack or purse with little consequence. However, from here is where your argument starts to unravel.. un-peel if you will.

Clementines do indeed have wrappers - thick, orange, acidic, sticky, horribly sour, obstructive skin that you must unwrap before even contemplating consumption. And what a process. I am surprised clementines don't come with a step by step pre-consumption guide. If they did, it would go a little something like this:

  • Step 1: Using your thumbnail, or other similarly angular part of your person or other device (such as a knife), commence peeling of the clementine. If experienced, the skin may be removed in one spiral, otherwise simply pull the skin from the delicate flesh of the edible portion of the clementine piece by piece, until you have removed all of the inedible exterior. Be sure not to squirt the acidic skin juice into your eyes as intense pain will ensue.
  • Step 2: As a matter of personal preference, you may choose to remove all the remaining white rind from the exterior of the edible flesh, though this process can be time consuming.
  • Step 3: Importantly - as you would surely mess yourself should you bite into the whole edible portion of the clementine - you must dismantle the clementine, delicately prising apart each of its segments. Half at first, then segment by segment, being sure not to rush and potentially drop half of your snack.
  • Step 4: As you separate each segment from the larger portion of edible flesh you must carefully inspect its contents ensuring there are no seeds. Failure to do so - in case of seed presence - will result in immediate and unexpected cracking of the seed in your teeth, causing instant flavour contamination of the whole segment.  Whilst not toxic, the flavour of the seed is very bitter and may ruin the snack experience.
  • Step 5: Once you have completed all preceding steps, the clementine is now ready to be consumed.


Now, a requisite characteristic of the ideal snack surely must be that you can pick it up, and with minimal fuss, simply commence consumption. Clearly, a clementine does not have this characteristic. Whilst an apple on the other hand, truly can be picked up, placed in the mouth, and consumed. No further fuss, and no further debate.


The snack of my preference is unequivocally, the superior, the ultimate.


The apple is truly, the ideal snack.



No comments: